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Celebrate International Joke Day With Tristan

Tristan's Treasure Trails Jokes

This is Tristan!


He's the nicest chap you'll ever meet (he didn't even have to pay me to say that), is responsible for making sure our Trails are tip top, makes a killer coffee to get you through the working day and LOVES a grate cheesy pun!


Prepare for some rib tickling LOL moments when reading through Tristan's 76 Treasure Trails Puns for International Joke Day!

Q:        Which Trail do you ask for when you’ve run out of others to do?

A:         Aviemore


Q:        Which Trail should you do when making a cake?

A:         Bakewell


Q:        Which Trail would be like a female James Bond?

A:         Beverley Spy


Q:        Which Trail makes you grow?

A:         Biggar


Q:        Which Trail is a vicar from New Zealand?

A:         Bishop Auckland


Q:        Which Trail is a perfect sandwich spread for boaters?

A:         Braunston Marina


Q:        Which Trail does a builder have when making Walls-ham?

A:         Brixham


Q:        How do you walk a tricky Trail in South Wales?

A:         Caerphilly


Q:        Which is the best South Wales Trail to walk when you’re cold?

A:         Cardigan


Q:        Which Trail would you do if you liked your steak very, very, very well done?

A:         Chard


Q:        Which Trail would you do with cake ingredients?

A:         Cookham


Q:        Which Trail is a farmer moving their herd over a river?

A:         Cowbridge


Q:        Which Trail is a Mafia boss’s favourite when using sugar to bake?

A:         Doncaster


Q:        Which Trail would you do when you want to be let inside?

A:         Dornoch


Q:        Which Trail would you have completed when you walk away from an urban area?

A:         Dundee City


Q:        Which Trail is a currant cake storage facility?

A:         Eccleshall


Q:        Who is doing a Trail now?

A:         Eyam


Q:        Which Trail do you do when you’re a counterfeiter?

A:         Fakenham


Q:        Which Trail would you do when a forest is on fire?

A:         Fleetwood


Q:        Which Trail is a foul in football?

A:         Hamble


Q:        Which Trail is like flea powder to a ghost?

A:         Haunted Hitchin 


Q:        Which Trail do you do when you meet a Roman?

A:         Hayle


Q:        What does a witch do to curse a Trail?

A:         Hexham


Q:        Which Trail would you need stilts to climb over to get into a field?

A:         Highgate


Q:        Which Trail should you always stop for?

A:         Holt


Q:        Which Trail is one “L” of a distance from California?

A:         Holywood


Q:        What’s the best time of day to do a Trail in Berkshire?

A:         Hurley


Q:        Which London Trail would upset a male monarch?

A:         Kings Cross


Q:        What would you say when you can’t get enough of the Suffolk Trails?

A:         Lavenham


Q:        Which is the best Trail to find toilets on?

A:         Looe


Q:        How would a military person complete a Cambridge Trail?

A:         March


Q:        What’s the best way to serve potatoes in North Yorkshire?

A:         Masham


Q:        What’s the best bread to serve with curry on a Trail?

A:         Nairn


Q:        What do you call a man with a salamander on his head?

A:         Newton Stewart


Q:        How do you drink Yorkshire Tea?

A:         Otley


Q:        What is an artist’s favourite Trail?

A:         Paignton


Q:        What do you call it when you can’t write anymore?

A:         Pembroke


Q:        What’s on top of Peter’s neck?

A:         Peterhead


Q:        Where would you find Peter’s sheep?

A:         Petersfield


Q:        What do you do when you want to propose to your girlfriend?

A:         Pickering


Q:        What do you say if you see an injured Oak?

A:         Portree


Q:        What do you say when you push a button?

A:         Prestatyn


Q:        What do you call it when the top of the candle is too short to light?

A:         Prestwick


Q:        On which Cambridge Trail can you view lots of male sheep?

A:         Ramsey


Q:        Which Cornish Trail is it when a decorator spills paint over a lady?

A:         Redruth


Q:        Which blackcurrant drink is best for a picnic?

A:         Rhiwbina - Garden Village


Q:        Which Trail do you breathe when you’re standing by the coast?

A:         Saltaire


Q:        What are you doing when 5-6 of you are crowded round Trail booklets?

A:         Sheringham


Q:        What do you call it if the Trail ink rubs off on your clothing?

A:         Steyning


Q:        What do you call a baby’s blanket made into a jacket?

A:         Swadlincote


Q:        What do you call a big bird with glasses, looking at a lot of buildings?

A:         Swansea City Centre


Q:        What do you call a big bird with glasses, looking at a soggy fraction?

A:         Swansea Maritime Quarter


Q:        What should you try and do if a baddy is catching you up?

A:         Stalham


Q:        Which Trail lives next door to “Elevenby”?

A:         Tenby


Q:        Which Trail is it if you walk through a field of brambles?

A:         Thorney


Q:        What do you call a parrot that won’t stay quiet?

A:         Torquay


Q:        Which Trail would you need if you had an old telephone?

A:         Tring


Q:        Where would you find the female flour maker?

A:         Uppermill


Q:        How did they find out the river crossing was over 400 tons?

A:         Wadebridge


Q:        Which method did they use to stop the road flooding?

A:         Wallingford


Q:        Which Trail is perfect for a rainy day?

A:         Wellington


Q:        Which Trail can you drink from?

A:         Wells


Q:        Which Trail can you drink from on a beach?

A:         Wells-next-the-Sea


Q:        Which Trail does a climatic honey gatherer like the best?

A:         Wetherby


Q:        Which river crossing is Moby Dick’s favourite?

A:         Whaley Bridge


Q:        Which Trail could light a candle?

A:         Wick


Q:        Which Trail makes everyone wear hairpieces?

A:         Wigtown


Q:        Which Trail’s competition prize is a really, really, really heavy tin?

A:         Wincanton


Q:        Which Trail would you lift a heavy hair straightener with?

A:         Winchcombe


Q:        Which Trail isn’t very lucky?

A:         Winslow


Q:        Which Trail makes you wanna dance with somebody?

A:         Witney


Q:        Which Trail is David and Amanda’s alarm clock?

A:         Wokingham


Q:        Which Trail do David and Amanda dance to?

A:         Wolsingham


Q:        Which Trail is a timber merchant’s favourite?

A:         Woodstock


Q:        Which Trail covers a sheep-er?

A:         Wool-er


Q:        On which Trail could a suburb of London be a competition prize?

A:         Winchelsea

Win Your Next Treasure Trails Adventure!

We love a good laugh here at Treasure Trails HQ, so if you've got inspiration from Tristan's puns and have created your own Treasure Trails related joke then ping it over to us at enquiries@treasuretrails.co.uk

Send in your Treasure Trails puns to us before Monday 8th July 2019 and the 'Pun Master' (AKA Tristan) will select his top three who will win at Treasure Trail of their choice!

24th May 2019

Posted In: Did you know, Ideas

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Take on a Treasure Hunt this May Half Term

Potential privateers and budding buccaneers need to prepare for a swashbuckling adventure with Treasure Trails this May Half Term.

The Treasure Trails Crew have gathered their Top 10 Treasure Hunt themed Trails throughout the UK for you to try.

The Treasure Trails Crew

Top 10 Treasure Hunt Themed Trails

Explore the cobbles, country and coast of the UK whilst looking for clues with your crew. Uncover X marks the spot and possibly claim some pirate booty!

Gather your crew-mates and head out on a Treasure Hunt exploring the ancient head of the Pilgrim’s Way - once the main trade route between London and Canterbury.

Head to this Cornish filming location and spot clues in Doc Martin’s hometown and the fishing village where it all began for now film stars Fisherman’s Friends. As you head down to the harbour see where fisherman still land their catch and follow the South West Coast Path along the cliff tops.

Hunt along the old cobbled streets of Bath and discover a tale bound in maps which have recently landed from Tortuga, a pirate’s paradise! One University professor is convinced the map leads to the lost loot of ‘Nachos Itza’…

Young pirates can try their hand at punting in this University town. Old records show treasure was buried somewhere in the city, can you follow the clues and uncover its location?

Treasure hunters will need to cast their eye across gardens, a park and All Saints Church on this Treasure Trail exploring Marlow town centre.

Discover the location of the buried treasure on this truly nautical waterfront Trail which leads you through the newly developed Maritime Quarter, explore locks and bridges and historic ship yards.

This easy to navigate Trail follows the Golden Mile passing the Pleasure Beach and detouring through the town centre, including the infamous rock shops.

Hunt for treasure in County Durham’s only seaside town. Explore the seafront promenade, woodland areas and St Mary’s Church which is one of the oldest in the UK!

Buckle your kilt and prepare for adventure! Legend has it that Scottish Nobleman James Hepburn dabbled in a little piracy during the 1500’s however nobody has ever discovered his Treasure, will it be your crew?

Notorious highway-woman, Peg Sleddle, was lost at sea during a storm and it is rumoured she took the location of her buried treasure with her. However, a map directing you to the lost loot has been discovered, will you uncover the treasure?

1st May 2019

Posted In: Did you know


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